Bothvar Beorcolsson
Blue-Eyes won’t eat. She lays in the corner and rarely moves. It is as if she has lost the will to live. It saddens me to see such a lively and merry creature lose all the joy and happiness in life. I do not know what to do. If only I could’ve gotten there sooner. Maybe I could’ve saved them. I began to consider them family and to lose them makes my heart bleed in pain. There must be something I can do for Blue-Eyes. Seeing her like this reminds me of when Thorkel died. She looks the way I felt. Lost, confused, and full of sorrow.
I spend the day trying to get her to eat. I search my cave for anything to help her. I find the old clothes I wore when I met the yeti. They’re all covered in my blood. I go to burn them only to find something in the pockets. A pendant. The same pendant I found during the raid that killed my brother. The one with the large crystal inside it. I was going to give this to my wife, Arni. I take it, clean it and hold it in my hands, rotating it.
As much as I wish I could, I cannot bring her family back. But… maybe I can provide her with a new one. Longhorn mentioned that they traveled north, leaving behind many yetis in the mountains to the south. They said humans encroached upon their lands and would hunt and kill their people, but surely Blue-Eyes would be better with her own people than to slowly die here with me. I’ll think about it. I take the pendant and hang it around my neck.
I walk out of the cave into the long, cold winter that seems to never end. Even though the cold no longer bothers me, this lack of sunlight snuffs any hope inside me. My skin has darkened much and has almost become iron. Pain has no hold over me anymore. I have long ago lost track of the days, but it feels as if it should be spring by now.
Looking down the mountain at the little speck of my village, I can’t help but think about my own family and people back home. They are always on my mind and in my heart. I hope they are well. I pray to the gods to keep them safe. Especially Fridgerd, the mother goddess, Siv, Thunar’s wife, and Frida, the goddess of love and fertility. Those are Arni’s favorites. Surely, they will look after my wife and child. She has been a faithful believer.
I wonder how my father and mother are doing. Does my father still grieve? Does he blame me for Thorkel’s death? What about my siblings? Are they well? Do they blame me? I miss them, as strange as it sounds. Thormar and his stupid logic. He was always strange. Always collecting maps and books even though I know he can’t read. What good is a book, anyway? You can’t use it to fight. Nor can it be used to hammer metal or cut wood. It would make good food for the fire though. But he seems to find some value in those books. Father never read, but mother always has many books. Svala too reads, but she is a girl and that is expected. But Thormar is a man. He should spend more time training and building his strength, not wasting time with these nonsense books.
At least Bodvar sees reason. He’s a bit wild, that is true. The boy is fearless. He’s always climbing things and getting into trouble. He is so much like Thorkel in many ways. The thought saddens me. I look back at the cave to where the hammer sits, still unmoved. I’m beginning to think it is impossible to lift that hammer. It must be magic. Maybe you must be a god to lift it. Or there is some kind of thing you must say or do. I do not know. There must be a way, but I cannot figure it out. It is like the hammer does not want to be picked up. Or it is as heavy as a mountain. I can lift tree trunks like twigs and yet I cannot move that hammer an inch. I’m ready to give up. Am I not worthy? Will I ever be?
What if I am incapable of avenging my brother? How can I bring my family peace if that elf still breathes? How can my brother rest while his killer still lives? But surely, he feasts in Valholl with the gods, right? He died honorably. As honorably as anyone could. That surely should earn him a place in Ornulf’s hall. If not, I will kill the elf so my brother can feast. I’ll earn back my honor. I’ll follow my brother’s dreams and sail west with Thormar, since he’s always wanted to do that as well. I’ll become the strongest warrior and be the most glorious Viking ever. I’ll sail to shores unknown and discover treasures our people can’t even dream of. All in my brother’s name, and when we meet in Valholl and feast in Ornulf’s hall, I will tell him all about it. I will make sure his children are a part of the glory and earn much honor. I will see them become strong, just like their father.
I return inside where Blue-Eyes lies, staring at the wall. I hear her soft cries and feel her pain. I say I no longer feel pain, but I was wrong. The pain my body endures is no more bothersome than a mild itch, but the pain I feel in my heart at the loss of these yetis is far more painful than any cut or bruise my body could ever endure. It was as unbearable as the pain I felt when Thorkel was slain in front of my eyes. I think love is the most unbearable pain there is.
Seeing Blue-Eyes like this is proof that I must do something for her, and the only thing I can think of is to take her south. It will be a long journey, especially in winter. It might take me many days and nights, or more depending on how bad the weather is. I can run most of the way at a steady pace with her on my shoulders if I pack lightly, but I won’t be able to wear the armor. That would slow me down too much. But I can take my ax and sword. I’ll pack up all the smoked fish I have and a few bags full of mushrooms along with a wineskin of glow rock water. I can put on my bear cloak. Thankfully, I could add a hood to it. It is settled. In the morning I will take Blue-Eyes south to her people.
—
After a short and restless sleep, I arise and pack what I need. I attach my blades to my belt and the food I store in packs I’ll have to carry. I wrap the spare cloak I brought with me from home around Blue-Eyes and the bear cloak around myself. Then I pick the little yeti up and sling her around my back, keeping her hands around my shoulders as I wrap my arms around her legs. Thankfully, she holds on.
Then I run. I run down the mountain at a steady pace, sloshing through the snow. Even with the little yeti, the bags of food, and my weapons, it does not feel like I carry much. The yeti is not heavier than the trees I haul up the mountain. I start my journey in the dark. It is not too cold out. Of course, I never feel all that cold anymore.
It is still dark when we reach the bottom of the mountain. I go east for a little before going south. I hope the river is frozen over. I do not want to cross the bridges to the northeast. They are usually guarded by the Southern Tyrants who have taken Chillshore. They do not belong there. Chillshore was always our city. One day we’ll take it back.
I run south on the peninsula to the east of our village. To the east of here on the same peninsula is the Builder Clan. A strange lot they are. Peaceful Northman. Sounds like a contradiction to me, but no one seeks to fight them because they are some of the best builders around. Shipbuilders, house builders, blacksmiths, and much more live in their village, and they are always willing to trade finished goods for raw materials as long as they get a cut of them for themselves.
I do not tire, not when I keep a steady breath. My muscles have been hardened into tempered metal. This journey is nothing. I feel no pain. The snow is a bit annoying; I always sink. I finally reach the river and it looks pretty frozen solid. It is as wide as a small lake, but there is a point at the southeastern tip of the peninsula that is its narrowest. I find it and hesitantly step on the ice.
It groans. It looked thick enough. I take another step, putting my full weight on it, and the ice breaks, causing me to fall through. It is only as deep as my knees at this point, but still, being wet is something I hate. I can feel the cold of the water, but it does not bother me. I guess I have become too heavy now. The ice will not hold me. I’ll have to wade through the water. I set Blue-Eyes down on the coast, pull out my ax and chop at the ice. One whack makes the entire river crack open.
I toss my ax to the other side and it slices through a tree, causing it to fall. I wrap the bundles of food with the flint around my sword and hurl it like a spear. It slams into the ground and stands there.
Then I lift the little yeti above my head and walk into the water, pushing aside the ice. The river continues to get deeper and deeper until I’m up to my neck in the freezing water. My body feels the cold water, but it does not bother me. The ice makes me feel alive. It tingles my skin with prickles. I take another step forward and go completely under the water. I do not panic and continue forward, doing my best to hold my breath and keep Blue-Eyes above the water. Another step and I’m deeper as the bottom half of Blue-Eyes gets wet. I struggle to breathe as I continue taking steps forward to a flat bottom.
My lungs strain for air in the ice-cold freezing water. It continues to prick my skin as I walk further. Finally, the next step brings me up. A few more steps after that and my head pops out of the water and I take in all the air I can. It feels cold, but I embrace it.
We make it to the other side and I stop to grab my things. I decide to stop here to make a fire and dry off. I take the tree and chop it up into nice logs and build a pyre, piling it up on top of each other like a log cabin. Then I get some dead wood and chop it up into little kindling. With my flint, I start the fire. I take some time to get the deadwood to catch because it’s frozen and when the flame hits it melts and becomes wet. Finally, little by little, the fire burns.
The pyre slowly catches flame. I pull my wet clothes off and hang them on a nearby branch while I dry off. Blue-Eyes also sits near the fire. I have to bundle my feet up in the cloth of one of the sacks. It takes much of the morning to dry my clothes. I suppose I could use a little rest even though I don’t feel in the slightest bit tired.
I take out a mushroom for each of us and Blue-Eyes reluctantly eats it. By the time I get back to running, I’m feeling the odd effects of the mushroom and Blue-Eyes must be too as she fiddles with the fur of my cloak. These mushrooms make me feel a connection with the trees. It’s like I can hear their heartbeats as if they were alive. I can smell the pine and hear the birds that stay behind in winter chirping. I can also hear what I believe are wolves stalking in the distance. I don’t know why I know it’s the wolves, I just know. They linger just outside my sight but trail me. Keeping watch.
I know these wolves are in league with the Wolf Clan. I saw it with my own eyes. They scout for them and hunt with them. I’ve heard stories that the Earl’s grandson and granddaughter, Baldric and Siv, can speak with these wolves. They’re twins of the Earl’s daughter, Asny. I remember them being at my wedding. And I’ll never forget the All-Clan Meeting when Thorkel tried to play a prank on the Wolves, only to be met by Baldric and Siv along with a pack of wolves. If they are in fact with the Wolf Clan, they must know I’m running through the forest. I suppose they have no need to fight or interfere with me seeing how I’m not heading towards their village, but they’re not the only clans in these woods. I must be careful. The Bone Eaters linger in these woods. They’ve long been outcasted by the other clans for their cannibal ways. Both the Bone Eaters and the Wolf Clans are to the east of my path.
The Valkyrie clan is also here, and these are their woods. I remember that all too well from when I first met Tonna and her mother, Amalasontha. A clan of all women. As crazy as it sounds, they are fierce warriors. I do not wish to fight them. But I am in their part of the forest and they do not take kindly to trespassers. They may not be able to stop the wolves from scouting these lands, but I am not a Wolf.
Far to the south and west of the mountains I seek is the clan of the late King Teowulf. His brother rules there with the King’s widow, and both have much honor. The Giant Clan lives far to the northeast, but I am not exactly sure where the Eagle Clan lives.
I have to turn east since I’m dangerously close to the road. The road is always full of Southerners, and I do not wish to fight them right now. I stop dead as I hear the footsteps of people approaching. Then, I set Blue-Eyes down and pull out my sword and ax. I then hear many pairs of feet make their way towards me. Who is it? If it is Bone Eaters, I’ll kill them all. And if the Wolves want a fight, they’ll get one, but it doesn’t smell like a wolf.
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